Hey, y’all! So bae & I have officially lived together for 3 months now but really 1 year (unofficially) so thought I’d answer some questions in full disclosure (because you know ya girl don’t lie) and just simply share my experience with it all!
So with the craziness of our 9-5s, we’ve taken a bit longer than expected to decorate our apartment but thankfully, we have just finished!!!! Yass, honey and we are obsessed! We originally were going for Scandinavian Monochrome with green accents, but somehow made our way to like a boho chic vibe!! Regardless, we finally feel like this is our HOME!
So gathering the decor is the fun part, y’all! We’ve turned so many trips to Homegoods and Hobby Lobby as day-dates, grabbed some hot chocolate beforehand, and literally shared the excitement of what each new piece would bring to our space.
I think this was such bonding experience for us because we both had ideas of what we wanted for the place and worked together to blend those visions into a reality.
But, its not always this fun! HA
Sooo let’s get down to the nitty gritty, shall we?!
1) Q: Are there more arguments now that you live together? And if so, is it normal roommate-type fights?
A: Hmm! I wouldn’t say there are more than before, but what I can say is that some have become more petty! HA.
Example: “Babe! You took the last meal prep! Now I will have to eat out for lunch tomorrow!”
Example: “Babe! You forgot to leave on the lights for Baby Troy” (our pup)
Example: “Babe! When will you be finished playing your video games?” (You can probably guess who says this :P)
TBH, I’ve had some really BAD roommates in my day so our living situation is a piece of cake in comparison to those people LOL. But I think what is key, is understanding that healthy cohabitation is literally a TEAM EFFORT. If even one person slacks off, the once cohesive environment can and will eventually turn toxic.
2) Q: When you guys do fight, how do you deal with it? Do you give space or deal with it immediately?
A: Well, it really depends. In many of my past experiences, living with roommates = one big, fat passive-aggressive mess! Luckily, with us, we address any tension on the spot! I hate awkwardness more than anything so we try our best to address it ASAP. There have been a couple nights when we just rather sleep than talk things through, but generally, we like to avoid going to sleep upset.
3) Q: Is moving together something your parents approved of? Also, how did you tell your parents?
A: My mom was on-board from the beginning. Although my dad died before he had the opportunity to meet bae, I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t have been opposed to it. And I say this because my parents moved in before marriage as well, ha! From the beginning, bae made his intentions clear…marriage! But as he knows that whole idea scares me (for now), he proposed us moving in together as the next logical step. Initially, I shared bae’s proposal to my mom about 6 months prior to moving. I toyed with the idea for a while and I think she was pleased with how I took my time in processing it all. She was also really fond of him at that point so we had that on our side. I think a parent will only be on-guard with cohabitation, if they sense a faulty relationship from the beginning or if one person has to sacrifice their quality of life for the move.
4) Q: How does your man feel when you have to dedicate more time to your blog/Instagram vs the relationship at any given point?
A: I feel so blessed to have a partner who truly understands this hustle. He was a food blogger prior to us getting together, so he had an idea of just how much time this crazy industry demands. But, what has taken time for both of us to learn is how to balance being roommates, significant others, and business partners. There are times, when one of the three areas suffer, but we have really fine tuned it in a way that works and fulfills us. I truly believe if he did not live with me and/or share similar passions, he would not understand the ins and outs and sacrifices us bloggers make to continue to do what we love.
But when we notice one area is slacking, we sit down and discuss and come up with a game plan on how we can rebalance it all. But it is A LOT of work! Especially when your boo, is your photographer, location scouter, editor, etc. I am very lucky to have found someone who just gets it!
5) Do you still feel the same giddiness you did when you would have sleepovers?
A: Yes! I still get those butterflies in my stomach when I’m walking in the door and vice versa. I think the nights I feel it the most are when we have plans of doing absolutely nothing but Netflix and chill! Those little moments are the moments I live for.
So far, we’ve had a really positive cohabitation experience. We share similar tastes which help in many areas of our living situation, but as everything in life, it is not always rainbows and sunshine. There are days where the vibe seems completely off and others where everything feels just perfect. I think the most important thing is learning from every experience/day you share together as a couple. We have strived to make each month better and better and I am blessed to have found a partner willing to give me that 100% effort. So, I’d say the two key pieces of advice I’d give to anyone on the fence of moving in with their partner is 1) make sure you’ve taken the time to really get to know each other & 2) be sure you’ve chosen a partner who shares similar interests. Because ain’t nobody got time for a toxic and distant living environment. XO